When I am asking what my passion in regards to my career is, I enthusiastically respond working with the teens on my caseload. I still get stunned when I get the strange looks from others. Then immediately I get asked the question, why? My response, why not? Working with today’s teenagers is a challenge but I have unleashed a secret, if you treat them as individuals and look past behaviors, you will be able to help guide them in making some amazing changes in their lives.
Personally, I enjoy working with the oppositional-defiant teens the most. Yes they are challenging, very verbal/opinionated, and strong-willed but these characteristics can be used to help them be survivors of past abuse, neglect, and trauma. I learned very quickly when I first started working with teens; they don’t care how things were when adults were teenagers and what they had to deal with.The challenges they have to go through in their teen years are more intense, dangerous, and cause them to be mature very quickly then when we were in our teens. For most teens, survival and safety are the biggest concerns they have to deal with on a daily basis. Letting them be themselves and not putting adult values on them allows them to get comfortable with the counselor and develop that trust but if the counselor begins to challenge their thoughts immediately, the hope of establishing the relationship distinguishes. As the counselor proves trust by listening and not judging them. I know it is part of our profession that ethically that we cannot judge a client, but realistically, we do have certain ideations of what we feel is appropriate and we have to get in check with our own values and what we expect others to do.
Teenagers today have their own sense of style, thought processes, and values that have changed significantly from societal values and norms. Partly they do it to be different, to be a shock value, to stand out from the crowd, or they do fall into peer pressure. Whatever their reason, the teens are our future and we have a wonderful opportunity to help them become comfortable with themselves and to be able to fulfill their dreams and goals. Sometimes they just need someone to look past the behaviors and see what is going on underneath their rough exterior.
